Real Life: L.A

[DAViE]

PREMIERE

A slender young man sips on champagne as he looks out his coach passenger seat window of his flight just about to arrive in Los Angeles, the city of angels. He clenches his heart. "All my hard work... it's finally paid off" he says with a glint in his eye, holding back a tear. "Excuse me- miss- Yeah hi, more champagne please" he says stopping a flight attendant. "Umm... you must have brought that here because we don't serve champagne in coach" says the attendant strolling away. 


^Confessional - Will

-lots of make up on- Yes, I'm heaar! I'm coming to L.A because I am someone with... TALENT. Talent that should simply *clears throat* not be over looked! This is my time to shine, and I will become a star! -delusional-. Thanks to my connections from The Real World, I have a good friend who is allowing me to stay with until I get my career going.


Will unloads his bags and proceeds to the terminal, where he is greeted by his friend a new room mate. "Oh hey gurl!" Will says flamboyantly. "BITTTTCCCCCCCCCH YES" says a too-tall-to-be-female preaches

^Confessional - Dominic

I'm back bitches -flips weave-. I've been living in L.A all my life and I KNOW everybody just wants to move out here and get their lives going. I mean why wouldn't you wanna live in L.A baby? Beaches, boys, boobies? We got it all -shakes flat chest-. Anyway, so I met Will at a gay club appearance -shrieks- I mean a CLUB appearance, and we like really hit it off. We have some similar interests and he seems motivated. He's wanted to visit to see if he could move out here and asked if he could stay with me while he gets acquainted with the area.

The two kiss on the cheek as they stroll into Dominic's Jeep Wrangler. "How was the flight?" asks Dominic. "It was fine bitch, what I need is a drink, Shitttt we need to get you a DRINK!" says Will. "Ohhh you! always trying to party" says Dominic teasingly slapping Will's hand. "Well you know,  I wanna be about THIS life!" says Will. "Well we're gonna get lunch with a friend of mineeeeee so you have plenty of time honey" says Dominic twirling his hair. "BITCH EYES ON THE ROAD" shrieks Will as Dominic nearly collides into a car as he attempts a merge. "ahahaha sorry!" pleads Dominic.


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"Honestly, why didn't you hire MEXICANS or something to do this? Why me?!" complains a tall and musclar young man as he unloads boxes from a uhaul into a new glendale mansion. A well composed late-middle aged woman gives the young man a look of total scorn as she sips on her scotch. "Oh, my apologies I forgot you live SUCH a BUSY and PRODUCTIVE life... doing what again? Oh that's right... NOTHING" she says dryly. "NOW GET TO WORK!" she scowls.

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^Confessional - Richie

So I'm in L.A now.... thanks to my mother -rolls eyes- great.

"I'm just saying.. with all the money you have to buy this ridiculous mansion-" "Ridiculous?! This is your HOME we're talking about Richard, have some self respect!" she scoffs. "As I was saying with all the money you have from your recent divorce.. from your fake marriage! You'd think you'd hire some people to help us move!" he shouts. she gasps. "-she sips her champagne- ME!? Valentina Delarosa - fake a marriage?! -evil laugh- I LOVED Bruce... he  just- " as she's interrupted. 

"RICHIE Don't talk to mom that way! Just move the shit, you shit bag!"

"UGGGGGGGGGGGGGH Drama... GO AWAY" he snarls. "I live here bitch!" she snaps back.



"You always take her side, you know that?" he says lifting a box. "Do not" she says rolling her eyes.

^Confessional - Richie

My mom recently has divorced for a third time... from a very successful podiatrist, got a shit ton of money and decides to move out here to "manage" my little sister Antoinette's career... I'm not sure what that is though... All I know is that while I'm out here I'm gonna be getting money and doing me. 

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^Confessional - Will

Dominic has arranged for us to meet a friend of his at a local posh location, it's simply adorbs, It's so L.A 




"Oh hey girl" says Dominic hugging his boss and friend, Linda. "Hey, how are you? Whos this?" she asks softly. glancing at Will. "Hi. William,  nice to meet you. This place did you pick it out?" he asks. "Yes I did, why?" asks Linda. "It's just so posh" he says proudly. Linda looks disgusted. "You must be new hmm? Have a seat please" she says sitting down next to Dominic. Linda looks at Dominic perplexed. "So how did you guys meet?" she asks pointing at Will. "Well... I, we were at a club and we hit it off." Will says trying to play it off. 

^Confessional - Linda

Hey America, how ya'll doing -flips weave-. Since my season ended I moved out here to L.A and own a beauty salon and so far so good. I hired Dominic a little over a year ago now and he's one of my top hair dressers, so like. When I see him associated with this guy William, I'm a little alarmed is all. His hair isn't washed and it looks like he needs a manicure.

a server drops off their drinks. "Are you gay?" Linda asks bluntly. Dominic's mouth drops. Will looks frazzled. "Um what??"he asks nervously. Linda begins to preach. " Honey there are cam-er-uhs everywhere you go in L.A. If you're not ready to be real, then you're not ready for L.A!." she commands. "You know it's okayyy Will." says Dominic sipping his drink

^Confessional - Will

Honestly I feel attacked right now. I just came here on a high and this bitch is trying to bring me on a low right now? She don't even know me!

"If you must know.. I am a lil bi curious" he says softly. Linda nods her head approvingly. "Anyway, what bring you to L.A?" asks Linda continuing the interview. Dominic giggles as he sips his margarita. "I'm here to make connections" he says ambiguously. "Well, here's my card" she says handing it to him. "Me and Domdom do hair together" she says flipping her weave. "We do washes too." she hints. 

the three continue to chat over lunch


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A bearded bastard barbeques for his girlfriend as he relishes their alone time together, while the blonde seems preoccupied by her cell phone.

"Let me see your phone" he asks. "Hold on! Emailing" she insists. "Allie" he says frowning. "Spencer! It's like a magazine asking me to write for them!" she shrieks! They both jump up and down happily as he kisses her.

^Confessional - Allie

I'm just hanging out with my boyfriend today. He lives such a lax lifestyle, and I'm just like naturally busy and almost have no time for him. So I'm trying to really give him my undivided attention 

"This burger is great" she squeaks. "Come here you got some ketchup on your lip" he says wiping it off her and eating it. Allie receives a text and begins answering it. "Babee come on!" he wails. she continues texting. "Allie.. seriously" he says getting annoyed. "It's Shayna!" she says. Spencer rolls his eyes. "Oh god forbid she doesn't get an instant response" he says agitated.

^Confessional - Allie

Since my season ended I'm back home in L.A, writing and doing some modeling on the side here and there. My boyfriend is a huge escape for me from all the stress I have, he makes me happy

"Well we're room mate." she says. "I'm your boyfriend." he says rolling his eyes. "Babe!" she pleads. "I just swear  I feel like every time we're together she makes it a point to text you the entire time." he complains, looking over to seeing Allie texting again.

"Ugggggggggggggh" he exhales. "Ok I'm sorry sheeeeeeesh" she says flipping her weave." He begins mocking Shayna.

"I beat cancer feel bad for me waaaah" he says obnoxiously. 

"Allie you have money and friends let me live with you" 

"Allie you join crossfit, me too wAAAAH"

"I want Allie to myself,



I want Allie to myself"

Allie giggles a bit. "Oh my god stoppppp. We're besties" she says smiling and popping a shoulder

[Cali Royalty]

"So this is it???..." said a sharply dressed brunette gentleman with a fresh shave.



"Yes sir, this is the property... I know it looks unappealing and very rundown, but I assure you sir this would be the best venue for the establishment that you are envisioning" said a pretty black girl with her hair pinned up and eyeglasses.

"No, no, no, Debbie I don't you for a second... I think it's perfect! None of my clubs were masterpieces when we first purchased them, but you know... that's what we do! We take the unwanted and we turn it into the perfect hotspot." said Clarke.

"Sir, when will your partner be down to LA to state his approval?" asked Debbie the assistant.

"Oh... Elic? He trusts me with everything" said Clarke.

"Mhmmm... sir... what ever you say, you always wanna hog everything for yourself, I told you that you weren't built for a business partner" said Debbie with a smirk.

"Debbie what do you think you are??? Aren't you already my business partner? We get along great" explained Clarke.

"Oh, you know what I mean... As much as I'd love to believe that we are equals, I know that you always have the final say. I am YOUR assistant. You know a partner has a say as well.. Elic has 50% stake in this business" said Debbie before she was cut off.

"49% stake... I still have controlling vote" said Clarke with a wink.

"This poor guy Elic knows nothing about business... and he has no idea what he is getting himself into" laughed Debbie.

"Oh Elic is a great buddy. He's better off shutting up, letting me do what I do best, flying down and snipping the ribbon with me... take a couple of photos at the grand opening, and then collect a hefty pay check" said Clarke.

"I see" said Debbie.

"By the way Deb, what did I tell you about your attire... You are my business assistant in real life, not in a porn movie... You never have to show that much cleavage, I swear you want me at times" said Clarke.

"Oh please..." said Debbie strutting away with her pen and tablet.

"HEY JORGE!!!" yelled Clarke.

"Yes sir" said a project manager with a construction hat on...

"I want this to be completely knocked down, and I want the entry way here, and this there" said Clarke explaining to Jorge what he wanted him to instruct to the workers.

"Got it boss" said Jorge.

Confessional Clarke: Despite how greedy I may seem, I am actually excited to work with my buddy Elic. I just know he can't make it out here as soon as I'd like him to, so I have to remain confident and unbothered  in front of my employees... Rule number 1 of business, don't ever freak out in front of your employees because if you do, then so will they and then they will fuck up your project.

Clarke looked down at his cellphone and saw that his kik message to Elic was still on "D"...

-sigh...- Clarke gasped and got back to business...

camerflashes  to venice beach, and shows happy tourist walking around, then flashes to an LA freeway, and then flashes to the next location where you see a frazzled blonde.






"LORD!!!! This is the LAST TIME that you send me some fucking ametures Susanne!" snapped the frustrated blonde.

"I am sorry, it's not my fault that they used 5 year old airbushed and filtered photos, and lie on their resume Kori" said Susanne... a beautiful California blonde with perkie boobs and a pencil thin physique.

Kori looked got off from her table in which she sat during this failed audition and looked up at a portrait on the wall of Trish from season 6 Hawaii.

"This! -points to Trish's photo- Is what I have to live up to... The late great Trish Baker... she trained 14 Miss Teen Cali's who went onto become Miss Teen USA, she has a damn legacy under her belt while reigned as president of miss teen California, and I have how many?" snapped Kori.

"You have zero maam" said Susanne.

Confessional Kori: I am your girl Kori from season 10 of Real World, you know when I was approached with this opportunity I had to say HELL YES! You fans didn't get to see the entirety of me since I was a replacement, so here is a chance for me to be reintroduced to you guys. I am the president of Miss Teen California,I was selected to take over since Trish Baker passed away tragically of an overdose... *you hear producer ask her if she speaks to any of the "4 snobs" since they also live in LA"... *Kori rolls her eyes*

"But but... that's okay! You are brand new... you've only been with us for 2 years and we have a long way to go" said Susanne.

"2 years, 2 fail Miss teen Cali's down the fucking drain... first year, we made it to the final 2, got my hopes up and then they picked that bitch Miss teen New york!, and then my second year we didn't even make the top 15 and they chose Miss teen Nebraska... WTF IS A NEBRASKA!?" snapped Kori.

"Well maam, karma is a bitch, and when miss teen New york won as Miss Teen USA, you did try to sabotage her with phony porn opportunities to get her dq'ed...." explained Susanne.

"I was trying to get Charleen to become Miss Teen USA by default." snapped Kori.

"Trish would have never did that" said Susanne.

"Do you want to be fired?" asked Kori...

Susanne got silent but then she quickly remembered something "Oh, we did have a girl! She sent me an email... she is stunning, GORGEOUS, she got accepted into Harvard, Princeton, and Yale, and she is a virgin, who takes her charity work very seriously..." explained Susanne, then she showed Kori a picture of her.



"Why didn't you bring this little bitch in to begin with? She is fucking Miss Teen USA title bait" said Kori

"It says at the bottom that she also won titles such as Miss Teen Gay Pride 2012..." said Susanne.

"So, she's a carpet muncher? It's 2014, the council loves that shit" said Kori.

"No... she is transgender" said Susanne.

"Oh..." said Kori biting her nails...

Flashes to the Hollywood sign and then shows the Griffith Observatory and the Watts Towers, and then flashes to the nice condo of the Millionaires...








"GOSH MELISSA!!! YOU TAKE HOURS IN THE BATHROOM" snapped Allison.

"Girl, you know this duh... Why are you so eager today anyways?" snapped Melissa.

"Dana is coming over today to discuss business" snapped Allison.

"Since when did you have to get ready for her? It's just Dana... we can have meetings in our jammies with her" said Melissa.

Allison rolls her eyes...

Confessional Allison: HEY BITCHES!!! The Queen on mean is back on your motherfucking TV SCREENS! Did you miss me? I'm Allison Greene, the STAR of the Real World series and the winner of All Stars season 1. Me and my sister have been in Los Angeles living the LA dream, but me... I am ready for the next level in my life... I wanna be solo! I wanna be ALLISON GREENE, or better yet... Just Allison. Or maybe just Allie... Oh nevermind that's the name of that little bitch from season 10 who tried to take my title as baddest bitch... Long story short... Melissa doesn't know this yet but I am going to be presenting Dana with the opportunity of a lifetime which is... Me, myself, and I... and I want to look AMAZING while doing it, so she can see that I am hot enough and still young and fresh enough to be a face all on my own.

-Shows Allison diva strutting-

[DAViE]

A petite pretty middle eastern girl strolls up to Alison's Condo with a clipboard and pen handy.

^Confessional - Dana

After all stars I quit law school and became Alison's and her band's manager. We did a couple of tours with some music festivals but we haven't really hit big yet... plus we're not like on a real label. But I'm coming to deliver some great news that we've finally gotten noticed by a major label and they wanna sit down and meet with us!

"Hi bitch" says Melissa greeting Dana. "DANA, we have some URGENT THINGS to discuss!" yells Alison across the room. "Omg I just got here!" she yells back. "DAAAAAAAAAAANNNNAAAAAAAAAAA" roars Alison. Dana rolls her eyes and strolls into the other room. Melissa follows after. "Excuse me but what is up hoe?" asks Dana. "Yeah really? Why are you dressed up like that?" says Melissa smoking a cig in the house. "Can you please not blow that my way??" Alison commands flipping her weave. "Well you seem extra today" snaps Melissa. "AHAHAHA" giggles Alison. "Mk, well.. I have some urgent news too!" insists Dana. "Well -" says Allison as Dana interrupts her "A LABEL WANTS TO SIT DOWN WITH US!!" she cheers. "This is wonderful!" cheers Melissa. "THIS IS TERRIBLE" cries Alison.

^Confessional - Alison

With Dana's good news it's kinda going to be that much more devastating to my sister Melissa when I tell her I'm breaking up with her. But I've already made up my mind, no one and not my sister - is going to hold me back from being a STAR.


"Wait what, WHY?" asks a confused Dana. Melissa flips her weave and ashes on the carpet. "Yeah why Allie?" asks Melissa. "Umm well -flips weave- that's kinda what we need to talk about." says Alison pushing up her bra and grabbing a bottle of champagne. "What?" asks Dana. "I'M GOING SOLO!" Allison yells laughing evilly as she pops the bottle.

"Whatttttttttt?" says a dumbfounded Melissa as Alison begins pouring herself and Dana a glass. "Cheers!" Says Alison ignoring her sister. "Wait what do you mean? going solo" asks Dana sipping the champagne. "Well, ya know...... -sips champagne- yaaaaaaaaaaaaaa know" says Allison. "Alison you stupid fake ass bitch, we're in contract together" says Melissa. "Actually.... incase you forgot.. the reason why we were looking for labels is because our contract ended.... 5 MONTHS AGO??" says Dana. "What do you mean?!" both sisters say in unison. "Ummmm helllooooooooo we haven't done anything in the music buisness in like 8 months other then party" Dana says dryly. "Oh.. true" says Melissa rolling her eyes. "Wait so... now what?" says Melissa unamused. "YOU GET OUT" commands Allison.

"I'm telling mom you ungrateful bitch!" snaps Melissa. "Melissa, you're fired" says Dana softly. "Bitch I'm not fired, you're fired!I'm telling mom!" snaps Melissa flicking her cig on Alison's carpet and leaving.

^Confessional - Dana

Well I'm Alison's manager, not Melissa's so losing her as a client is a pay cut I'm gladly willing to make.


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Dominic and Will part ways from Linda as they now meet up with another friend of Dominic at a local club for a night out in L.A

^Confessional - Will

So I'm in L.A! MY new city, and Dominic is just the perfect side kick, he's introducing me to people, showing me places! Now I'm going to show L.A how I get down.

"Richieeeeee<33333" says Dominic radiating love as he hugs Richie. "This is Will" he says to Richie. "What's up I'm Richie" he says as the two exchange greetings.

^Confessional - Richie

Dominic and I have a unique friendship. He can be kind of embarrassing sometimes but.. he's a really good person so I'm happy to see him.

The
"So where are you from?" asks Richie. "Long Island!" says Will. "Oh shit me to haha. What part? I've lived practically everywhere" says Richie. "Nassau" says Will sipping a margartia. Dominic flips his weave, "Drinks here please!" he calls out. "I know the Dj." he slips in - "No way that's where I'm from originally, you must be a party boy!" jokes Richie pumping up Will's ego. "OH you better believe it." says Will fluttering

^Confessional - Dominic

-rolls eyes- We're barely through the night and I can already tell Will is in love with Richie. So typical.





-shows montage of the 3 of them taking shots-

-shows montage of Dominic booty popping-

-shows montage of Will booty popping-

-shows montage of Richie pointing and laughing-

"My phone's dead and I don't have pants on so... can you hold it?" says Dominic flipping his weave and pointing to his skirt. "Me and Richie are gonna go out for a smoke" he says waving good bye to Will. Will takes the phone and continues dancing and drinking alone

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Outside Richie and Dominic take a smoke beak

Dominic gives a drunk giggle as he lights his cigarette. "So you like Will huh?" asks Dominic. "Actually I think he's desperate" says Richie bluntly. "HA! -flips weave- It's because he is" admits a drunk Dominic. "Well he likesssssss you I think" says Dominic. "I mean, who doesn't?" Richie says arrogantly. Dominic sighs "I guess you're right<3"

"I'm beat dude, you ready to head out?" offers Richie. "Umm yes, I have an early day and a couple of important appointments tomorrow." says Dominic facing reality. "Is Will going home with you tonight?" asks Richie. "Yeah he's just visiting for a few days" says Dominic naively. "Bow chicka bow wow" jokes Richie. "UGH" groans Dominic

--------------------

Dominic and Richie return to inform Will it's time to go. 

"Oh what? It's only 4:45... turn down for what?!" says a very drunk Will. Richie rolls his eyes. "Know your limits honey" says Dominic. "Domdom! It's my first night out." says Will annoyingly. "Ok fine, but can you give me my phone we need to go" demands Dominic. Will points to the table "It's right- " - "oh shit it's gone~" he says melodramatically.
"Bitch I need my phone what the fuck!" snaps Dominic. "It was here a second ago!" exclaims Will. "Well it's gone NOW. Sooooo now the fuck am I gonna do!?" snaps Dominic. "Well there's no point bitching, lets go the cab's here." says Richie getting off the phone.

^Confessional - Dominic

Tonight was fun until Will lost my phone. I swear why did I HAVE to pick tonight to wear a dress -applies lip gloss-

[Cali Royalty]

-SHOWS SUNRISE over Los Angeles as a new day begins-



"You're late for your appointment Debbie" said Linda at her Beverly Hills hair salon... "It's already bad enough that you got me awake at 6 am... My shop isn't even open yet and you show up 45 mins late!?" snapped Linda again.

"Linda give me a break please girl, you know my boss is working me to the bone, and I need the early appointment because I have to work on another project for him in less than 2 hours" said Debbie.

"Girl, hurry and bring your exhausted self to this chair" said Linda as she patted the salon chair.

"Thanks for understanding!" said Debbie as she gasped and unpinned her hair.

"So what do you want this time... that same boring Sarah Palin updo?" asked Linda as she pointed to her hair chart.



"Yes girl, I have to keep it conservative" said Debbie fixing her glasses and pushing up her boobs.

Linda giggled and began combing through Debbie's hair.

"So girl, tell me... who is this boss of yours? He seems to forget you're human" said Linda.

"His name's Clarke, he is actually building a new bistro and bar with his new best friend, who was an ART MAJOR mind you, and he also expects me to screen 5 females for him for a blind date..." said Debbie.

"He's rich and single???" said Linda clutching her pearls.

"Yessss girl, and I already screened 4 successful girls for him... 1 girl named Jenny she's in medical school, another aspiring model and singer name Kat, a music biz manager named Dana, and reality tv star named Heather who was on America's Next Top Bad Girl." said Debbie

"What about me, I am successful, and I am beautiful, I am a true business woman." said Linda.

"Ummm girl, I can squeeze you in but you CAN'T say you know me, just say I networked you though his dating profile, and I held an interview with you" said Debbie.

"Ohhh yesss girl of course of course" said Linda flipping her long weave.

"Here's the card of the place we are having the mixer... the address is on the back, just be there no later than 7:30 pm, and dress fashionable..." said Debbie.

"OH GIRL DUH!!! I got this" said Linda.

On the other hand...

Kori was preparing to meet her potential transgender star.

"Why do you look so nervous maam?" asked Susanne.

"It's just that... I am not sure if the teen Miss USA council is ready for this kind of bombshell... I mean a lesbian, maybe, but a man!" snapped Kori.

"Trans-woman is the politically correct term ma'am, you're liberal Kori, you've never been so insensitive" snapped Susanne.

"Yes, I am liberal and all but I am nervous as fuck, this girl looks so perfect on paper, but I just don't know if I am making the right decision by allowing her to compete" said Kori with bags under her eyes.

"Oh, here she is!" said Susanne as Dylan walked into the room.

"Hi hun, muah muah" said Susanne as she kissed Dylan on each cheek.

"Dylan.. Meet Kori" said Susanne.

"Wait Dylan... Isn't that??? A man's name still?" asked Kori.

"I could've sworn Kori was too" said Susanne.

"Corey the male version spelled with a C is, but with a K and an i at the end like mine, it's a female... it's actually unisex either way tbh" snapped Kori.

"Well ummm I felt like as a trans activist I should be able to make my own rules, and I shouldn't conform and assimilate into the dominant culture full of gender stereotypes so I kept my birth given name..." said Dylan.

"Oh... ok, well this just makes it worse for me" said Kori dropping her head.

Confessional Kori: I was considering it like 60% but it just dropped to 30, because she kept her male name and she still sounds like a guy sort of, I am sure she's a nice young lady with many accomplishments, but I don't think America is ready yet

-Flashes to shots of the staple center and the santa monica pier-





- several hours later Back at the Millionaire's place-

"I love the idea of you going solo, now we can be a lot more flexible and a lot more creative, I have tons of ideas on how I can make you the white Beyonce" said Dana.

"So, we are going to meet with my new label tomorrow right?" asked Allison.

"YOUR POTENTIAL NEW LABEL, YES! But remember, I presented the idea of a group to them... we have to be realistic, they may not want the deal as much anymore" said Dana.

"OR... THEY MAY WANT IT EVEN FUCKING MORE!" snapped Allison...

"We'll just have to wait and see, but Oh gosh will you look at the time!? I've gotta go!" snapped Dana.

"Where the hell are you off too? Why in such a hurry to leave?" snapped Allison.

"Well 1 I am in a hurry because I've been here all day long with you discussing ideas of your solo career, 2 I have been verbally attacked by your mom and Melissa all day long, and 3 I have a date tonight" said Dana.

"You little whore... who are you dating???" snapped Allison.

"It's this business owner multimillionaire, the lady didn't tell me who... it's a blind date with 4 other females." said Dana.

"What kind of shit is that!?" snapped Allison

"If this was an ordinary guy... I wouldn't agree to date him with 4 other women, but he is rich... super rich, and the bitch said he's super handsome, so hey! A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do" said Dana

"Dana, you're smart... kinda pretty, you don't need an asshole who can't treat you to a REAL romantic 5 star date, and is soooo obnoxious that he has to pretend he's on the bachelor" said Allison.

"You just want me to stay single" said Dana

"No, I want you to know your self worth" said Allison. "So ummm...Stay with me pleassse" said Allison poking out her bottom lip.

"FINE!" said Dana dropping her head...

"YAY!!!!" said Allison kicking her feat back and forth...  "SOOOOOOO Come help me pick out what I should wear at the label meeting tomorrow" said Allison as she yanked Dana's arm and pulled her.

Meanwhile...

Linda was getting out of her convertible and strutting her stuff  into the blind date venue...


Confessional Linda: I hop out of my vehicle and this place looks like something I have seen in movies which makes me more nervous because, I have been to a few cancer charity events here and there where I passed out cards to my wig line, but, I have never been out on a date like this in ages... I hope things go well...

"LINDA YOU MADE IT! Welcome to the Playboy mansion... Okay Clarke is over there with the other ladies sitting and talking over cocktails, please join them" said Debbie guiding her at the entrance.

Linda looked over and saw Clarke's dashing smile and almost fainted.


"HOLY MOLY what a man!" Said Linda to herself as she walked in...

"Hello my lady you look absolutely breathtaking tonight, please have a seat with the rest of the lovely women" said Clarke.

"Thanks... Thank you" said Linda pretty nervously.

"I was just talking to Jenny here, she was telling me how difficult medical school was at UCLA" laughed Clarke.

"YESSSS Super hard, but super worth it" said Jenny

"I mean you have ridiculous classes and ridiculous amounts of exam, how would you have time for Clarke" said a rude girl named Kat.

"Um..." said Jenny who was taken aback.

"Oh oh, I am sure she'd find a way to make time, I'd never get in the way of he education..." said Clarke being a gentleman and saving the day.

Kat rolled her eyes...

The other girl named Heather was too busy tossing back drinks and getting wasted...

"SOOOOO HOW DID YOU LIIIIIIIKE GET THE PLAYBOY MANSIOOON LIKE??? I ALWAYS WANTED TO LIKE... BE A PLAY BOY BUNNY..." slurred Heather the reality star.

"I gave my amazing assistant Debbie a 50k budget, I told her what I wanted, and she pulled some springs, and WALLAH... we have it rented for a few hours" said Clarke.

"Wow... you are ummm quite the playboy it seems... So perfect venue" said Linda as she twitched and stuttered in nervousness.

Clarke winked and raised his glass at her and then her took a sip.

"Oh well, lemme finish telling you about medical school... so one day I came into class and they were like, we are gonna have to saw open a pigs  gut, and I am like EEWWWWW, because blood makes me squeamish, which is why I am SHOCKED that I am in med school, but like" said Jenny as she was interrupted.

"NO ONE FUCKING CARES ABOUT YOUR MEDICAL SCHOOL BITCH!" said Kat.

Heather burped...

"Whoa whoa, ladies no need to tear each other down..." said Clarke.

"Yeah... um Clarke... i...i...i..isss riiiriiiriiiriiight." said Linda stuttering and shaking as she accidentally spilled her drink all over herself from shaking so much.

"OH MY! Let me get that" said Clarke as he wiped the wine off of Linda's gown.

"Thanks" said Linda.

Confessional Linda: WHAT THE HELL, I am a professional woman, why am I so damn nervous... I am making a fool out of myself"

"Ladies will you excuse me..." said Clarke

Clarke walked over to Debbie.

"DEBBIE!" said Clarke in a semi loud whisper.

"Yes sir?" said Debbie "I was just on the phone with the project manager and he said everything is coming out amazing, he made the guys work overnight and convinced them  with overtime pay, so the project may get down quicker than expected..." said Debbie.

"Good good, but where the hell did you find these girls... Kat is a complete bitch, Jenny only speaks of medical school which is annoying, Heather is a drunk fool, and Linda is a nervous wreck" said Clarke.

"I am so sorry sir, but I was banking on the 5th girl... she was my favorite. She related the most to me because she knows how to work with dominating personalities like yourself, and she seemed the most mature... but" said Debbie...

"But she didn't show up huh?" said Clarke.

"Nope, she texted me that she had to cancel and she had a business emergency" said Debbie.

"Reschedule with her, and ummmm tell these girls that I have a business emergency..." said Clarke as he zoomed passed Debbie.

"BUT SIR, WE ONLY HAVE 25K AT OUR EXPENSE SINCE WE WERE ONLY HERE 1 HOUR!" yelled Debbie

"DISMISS THE LADIES, CALL UP HUGH, TELL HIM HE CAN HAVE HIS MANSION BACK, AND TAKE THE OTHER 25K AND SPOIL YOURSELF" said Clarke, and then he zoomed off in his BMW.

END EPISODE